Bending over to pick a tomato out of my garden, my back froze and I dropped to my knees in pain. After weeks of hoping it was going to go away, and at the insistence of my physician, I got an MRI last week. Degenerated and bulging disks, along with arthritis are the diagnosis in my lower back. The MRI technician who took my images, asked me how I would have obtained this level of injury? Was I in a car accident, did I fall etc? I told her whilst looking into her eyes, "domestic abuse" I shook, and had to catch my voice from breaking so I didn't start to cry. She hugged me, and told me she was sorry. I know her words were sincere, and I took them to heart. What I thought about as my husband drove us home after the appointment, was how much I HATE Coward. I do not throw the word of HATE around lightly. I reserve it for the true monsters of the world. The child molesters, the people who beat children and animals and for those who beat their spouses/girlfriends/domestic partners. I hate Coward. I imagine it would be much easier to move on, if what his monstrous actions did to me, didn't affect my present life. Being told by your doctor to not go on the roller coasters at an upcoming vacation with your children, to never roller blade because one fall or that the jerking motion from the roller coaster could cause me to become vegetable. If getting out of bed didn't bring forth pain from my body all, damn, day, long, maybe I wouldn't hold such disdain for him. But I do, oh, I do. The MRI & X-ray technicians told me stories of taking the images of women who had come from domestic violent situations. That there were some like me, who thought that 10+ year old beatings, wouldn't have culminated to what was going on in their bodies today. How naive we all were, how naive most people are about this subject.
Get out NOW. Do not wait for him to say he’s sorry again. To get on his knees and cry…LEAVE NOW.
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